everyone you know is gonna die tomorrow everyone you know is going soon what a realization thinking none of us is gonna witness the new moon the sky is striped with crimson, black and yellow and fumes coming from the orgies under the red sun what a liberation thinking everything is gonna crumble, fall apart and be crushed why don't you join why don't you join in our asteroid euphoria (x4) think of all the money we will be saving soon we'll know if our gods are real or not imagine all the new life Earth will sprout 50.000 years after we're done think of all the hard work you had to muster to get a shitty job in a shitty town let those who have something to lose despair while we dance naked, free and have some fun while it lasts while it lasts while in the throes of our asteroid euphoria (x4)

police in Nigeria are holding a goat on suspicion of attempted armed robbery vigilantes seized the black and white caprine saying it was an car burglar who had used black magic to transform himself into an animal to escape the consequences of his felonies after trying to steal a Mazda 323 "de car thief was a goat! it had formerly been a man but now it was a goat!" the vigilantes' report reads as follows: "we were on patrol last night, as we do and in the full moon glow we saw some hoodlums attempting to rob a car we pursued them: in the shadows one of them escaped while the other... the other started mumbling a spell or some shit started growing hooves and a beard making weird noises under the baobab tree and when we got to him... he had turned himself into a goat! it had formerly been a man but now de car thief was a goat! by power of witchcraft and necromancy! (x4)" Kwara state police spokesman Tunde Mohammed had to go on record to reassure the public: "we cannot base our information on something mystical we cannot confirm the story, but don't worry the suspect is in our custody: he's eating straw and leftovers and appears to be calm being cute in the corner of his cell."

I got vaccinated to get abducted by aliens (x3) I got vaccinated to get abducted I got vaccinated to get tracked by the Greys so the can beam me up and put me in a zoo cage I got vaccinated 'cause of Slaughterhouse-Five and I like the thought of living in a hutch with my wife and we're naked, naked I got vaccinated to get abducted by aliens I got vaccinated to get peeped on by aliens I got vaccinated to get the fuck on with aliens I got vaccinated to get better 5G and download faster cracks and .mkvs I got vaccinated to get lead in my bloodstream so I don't float in water and they can't take me for a witch I got stuffed like a turkey with glowing poison that's how you get powers if you're not a rich white orphan I got stuffed to the brim with microchips so I can get better ads while they watch me shit and I'm naked, naked I got vaccinated to get spied by g-men I got vaccinated to get peeped on by g-men I got vaccinated to get the fuck on with g-men and lizard people as well I got vaccinated for the thrill of dying on the spot and be done with it I got vaccinated for the risk of dying, and giving old fucks a reason to bitch when they're all crammed together in the back of the bar drinking smoking getting covid and playing cards I got vaccinated without reading a line 'cause disclaimers are for pussies and no one buys WinRar no one buys WinRar (x2) or 7-Zip

I heard a clam die today I heard its shriek as it boiled but clams don't shriek you say when they boil the shriek was in your mind the shriek was in my mind the shriek was in my -- strange thing was the shriek of the clam in my mind it didn't sound like a scream of suffering rather like a scream of pleasure and deep love it sounded like a scream of love everything has to be love love my love how we will shriek, how we will shriek as we boil (x2)

this is a song about practicing what you preach and maybe live in constant fear of change (x3) you give me all of that jazz about self improvement and change of the self and yet you bathe in the same water you bathed in yesterday (x2) you park in the same spot you park in everyday you lose yourself in the same old labyrinth you give me all of that jazz about self correcting algorithms and change of the self and yet you bathe in the same water you bathed in yesterday you park in the same spot you park in everyday you lie in the same hell you burned in last may you laugh at the same jokes you laugh at every year bather (x2)

[inaudible gibberish courtesy of the one and only zombie elvis]